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The Doorway Was Too Small, So I Shrank

The steps aren't consistent sizes. The doorway heights change. The bathroom floors might be wildly inset or unexpectedly slope.

Basically India gives you every lesson you need including how to be incredibly aware of your surroundings and yourself every moment of the day. 

(It's not just the construction, I assure you)

So it was not a surprise when I hit my head walking out of the bathroom this week. Soundly.

Like,ohmother, I can feel the swelling right now.

What was surprising was that I didn't do the same on the way in.

I looked at the frame holding my head tenderly and eyed the durn thing with confusion. What in the greatgooglemoogley was going on? 

I stooped very low and went in and realized two things. The inner bathroom floor was just slightly higher than the room floor. And the doorway was at least half a foot smaller than me. 

You could have waved a winning lottery ticket in front of me then and I wouldn't have noticed. I stood there for several minutes doing posture exercises and I noticed how deeply I was slouching. 

I was flabbergasted with myself. 

You see I've spent the past few weeks navigating one of the countries thatis acknowledged as quite difficult to do so for female solo travelers. I went in with a passel of information about harassment/assault/safety and a twinge of paranoia mollified by the feeling that I don't believe the Divine has that story in the works for me. I have different soul things to do.

But I'm still human. And I get afraid and I contract and react like everybody else. And one of the reasons why I can be powerfully aware of my boundaries is because I've had them violated before. So this trip has been challenging and deeply thoughtprovoking on so many levels. 

InIndia I can't hide. I'm an alabaster face in a sea of varying hues of noir and caramel. I'm a woman in an overwhelming mass of men. 

And growing up and living in the US, where the average American womenis 5'4" (1.6m) and I am 5'8" (1.7m) and built more like Beyoncé than Taylor Swift - I've always felt like an Amazon.

Too tall. Too curvy. Too much. 

And here I am in India where the average height of a man is 5'5" (1.6m) and a woman is 5' (1.5m). And apparently I've felt too tall. So I've been shrinking. 

So if you're new here (bless you) and thinking what for the love, does this have to do with me? Here goes -

We all have spaces in our lives where we are less than our full potential. We all have places that we consistently navigate that are keeping us small. 

Your prompt today is to connect with where you are being constrained and constricted and evaluate whether or not you are ready to ditch that.


It could be something #quitebig (your job, a relationship, your career, your eating habits, your movement/exercise patterns, your daily vino or ganja habit) or #rathertwee (your wardrobe, the cult of personality at your gym, a snippy set of acquaintances at the school your child attends, and so forth).

Ask Dear Friends

An easy way to discern is to ask your closest, loving friends for what is holding you back - places, things, people. What they know you need to let go of in order to step into the next biggest version of you. 

Connect with Your Power

Run that joyfulmile, dance to that power song, get energized by your favorite activity, have a catch up call with that friend you adore - then get really aware of your body. Try to be so tuned in you can feel the inside of your toes. (!!!) And scan for what you interact with that 'brings you down'. You'll know because your voice will tighen or crack, your posture will shift, your beaming smile will abruptly fade... 

Iterate

And then you get the opportunity to ponder whether what keeps you small is something you need to keep. You can do anything you want in this life - you'll still get what spiritual learning you need and the Divine will still love ya. But what I know for sure is that the massive slouch is optional. You can follow your feel good and be oriented with your pleasure and massive success will follow. True story, dear ones. You're connected to me and I'm proof.

With Love and Light and a Conspiracy of Blessings,
Steph
Mythical HQ

Stephanie LaganaComment